I Cried, I Studied, I Submitted

Though its been a good amount of time since my last update, I finally got some much needed leeway. I OFFICIALLY submitted my application to the PhD program and I'm excited and beyond nervous at the same time. It is hard to just sit back and wait for that email or piece of mail to tell me what my next 5 years will look like.

But on top of that, I finished my research paper. While it could use some editing, it is all but ready to submit to a journal. I'm not sure if I'm going to send it to a general Public Health journal or to a journal focused on smoking. All I know is that I'm SOOO excited that its FINALLY over.

I literally have been stressing to the point of losing my hair. While not all of it has been work or application related, I was stressed nonetheless. I was wondering if I was ready to take such a large leap so soon after college. I started reading how people took skip years where they traveled and saw the world. I have been working. I love the experience I've gotten but I also wish I'd taken time out to actually done some traveling as well. I still have most of 2014.

I had originally scheduled my GRE for November 23rd and as it got closer, realized just how unprepared I was. So I spent the $50 and pushed it to December 4th. Am I ready for it? No. But this is as close as I'm going to get. I don't want to stress myself more than I have to especially considering that I have horrible test anxiety. I don't do well on standardized tests. I'm surprised I did so well on the SAT to be honest, considering I didn't even study for it. But I will say that I have actually invested in this exam. Between the $600 prep course, 2 GRE test prep books, and an additional GRE math workbook I'm hoping to improve my scores from 2011.

Now is the hard part. Do I write a supplemental statement discussing my medical issues which not only explain my average grades, but also my difficulty with standardized tests? I am an able student. I am a determined person, I just tend to be better when I'm discussing subjects, not being timed during a test. I've gotten a bunch of answers which don't necessary help me. I'm not sure what to do. But I know I'll make the right decision.

Regardless, once my 8am GRE is over with, I will be relieved beyond comprehension and rest for 13 hours. Okay maybe not that long, but I'm sure I will eat the HEARTIEST of breakfasts.

Heres to the future!!

Paulette